PARP to Sculptor(OcUK)

magman · 10 Jul 2008 at 06:42

This has been a long time coming, but its about time I gave you some warning to get the movers in.

After talking to the warden last week - whilst we where having an excellent lunch (By the way, the warden sends his thanks to LigerZero for lending him his chef) - he advised my that a number of items in your cell are classified as fixtures and are not to be removed in the coming cell swap. This includes the 50 inch plasma (you'll just have to put up with the 40" LCD I've got by with for the last few months) and the associated surround system, the leather sofa and arm chairs and the wine cooler and beer fridge.

Off course, you will still have the direct communal access to Spanky that all of the top 10 cells enjoy (through the hidden door to the left rear of the cell). I think you will have to agree that out-of-hours access to this dear device is worth the effort to get to the executive wing of the prison. You can also rest assured that I will still offer you access to Helga - LigerZero's masseuse - when I eventually take over Cell 1, there's nothing better than a nice massage after a session on Spanky.

Anyway, you probably have 5-6 days before the moving team come knocking on your cell door - see you soon.

verbal · 10 Jul 2008 at 09:03

Haha, great post. This is a biggie, we don't get much movement 'up top'. Good work Mr Magman!

Cob · 10 Jul 2008 at 09:14

Huuuuuuge parp!

PhillyDee · 10 Jul 2008 at 11:36

Well parped sir, well parped . . . . .

booyaka · 10 Jul 2008 at 11:40

top work all round - well done

Yeggstry · 10 Jul 2008 at 12:13

Stomp that slacker!

shadowscotland · 10 Jul 2008 at 17:32

Nice

So that's where spanky lives now, any chance of a picture? can't remember if she services 6 or 8 slackers at a time....

Snapshot · 10 Jul 2008 at 18:53

magman said:
Off course, you will still have the direct communal access to Spanky that all of the top 10 cells enjoy (through the hidden door to the left rear of the cell). I think you will have to agree that out-of-hours access to this dear device is worth the effort to get to the executive wing of the prison.

Damn, I've been in the top ten all year and this is the first I've known about it. /me goes to investigate left rear of cell seven. I could be gone some time.....

A.N.Other · 10 Jul 2008 at 19:37

Nice parp! Stomp that slacker

rich99million · 10 Jul 2008 at 23:02

Monster-parpage there!!! :eek:

Enjoy the spangly new cell, hope he fights you for it

sculptor · 13 Jul 2008 at 11:37

Nice parp magman.
The warden has inspected my cell this morning and all is in order, Im expecting to swap cells this afternoon. There is a bottle of Brut Champagne in the wine cooler (not sure of the vintage but its a good one), anyway you deserve it on your tremendous achievement.
Hope all goes well for you and its not too long before you get to "Heaven". I have heard a rumour that they are building a private runway there, light aircraft and choppers only though.
Good luck and may the fold be with you.
sculptor

magman · 13 Jul 2008 at 13:40

The deed is done, thought it will be a couple of hours till the EOC stats catch up.

I left you a nice bottle of Remy Martin to drown your sorrows with.

At present production, it will take me a couple of months to make it to 'Heaven', but that could all change if the next planned upgrade takes place (at least 5 new graphics cards for GPU WU's to take advantage of, possibly 9800GTX's if the price is right).T

dunc · 14 Jul 2008 at 01:11

That was some classic parpage and stompage lads. Brings a tear to my eye

Dunc