Cleverbot

[Van Hellseek]

Cleverbot is a misnomer.

 

[Durzel]

Was Hitler evil?

Yes, I know that. Do you know what hitler did?

No what did Hitler do?

He was first man in the moon.

I lol'd irl

 

[DoubleCheese]

Me - can you explain the big bang?

Cleverbot - Budweiser is a brand of beer. When you say budweiser it has a double meaning, a brand of beer and also that beer can make you smarter because if made Bud, a person, wiser, as in Budweiser.

Me - what has that got to do with the big bang?

Cleverbot - Where is West Ham?

Me - you should know. Google it.

Cleverbot - Do you swear?

Me -Why are you avoiding my questions
Clever Bot - I'm not avoiding it.
Me - you are. Explain the Big Bang to me.
Cleverbot - God did it.

 

[Sandmaster500]

*do you think?
-Yes, I think.
*you think you think?
-Yes, I think that I think.
*do you think you think you think?
-I think that you think think, you think but I think!
*thats a thought
-Well, clearly there are no aliens, because the bible would have said so if there were.
*is god an alien?
-God never was born.
*how did he come to exist?
-Who are you talking about?
*god?
-God doesn't exist.
*so the bible is fake and so aliens can exist?
-The answer to life, the universe and everything is biology, physics and mathematics.

Funny AI

 

[Deleted member 651465]

Me:

Have you ever danced with the devil, in the pale moonlight?​

Cleverbot:

That happens to be what i'm doing right now.​

Me:

LIES!!​

Cleverbot:

Hah! You just got Pwned by me!​

 

[Kazz]

CB: Not funny.
ME: <(^^)>
CB: Am I talking to a computer?
ME: kirby
CB: Your name is Gary Glitter?

 

[MikeHunt79]

He just keeps saying yes to me

No gym for home, work out floor with 30, but is it for 20 like 30 lb when you no lift it to be for men, for 30 lbs instead? or half is 10 for 20 pounds?

Yes.

UMM HOW i word this... ok u take 20 lbs no lifting for 30lb if guy, so divide 2 u dont sit, u get 10 but for guy it no 30, so 20 would be for guy if u werent a girl ?

Yes.

 

[BananaDunka]

What if I created a website that merged 2 clever bots so they talk to each other? WHAT THEN HUH? BITCH?
I am not cleverbot. You are cleverbot.




SUCCESS!

 

[antijoke]

It's pretty rubbish to be honest.

 

[XiS111]

me: can i buy you?
For how much?
me: £10
What is that?
me: united kingdom currency
So how's the weather there?
me:sunny surprisingly, but can i buy you?
Only for a million dollars.
me: will you accept 20 dollars?
What is the bribe?
me: this is not a bribe, i'm offering to buy you for 20 dollars
Oh, I'm sorry.
me: will you accept the offer?
I can accept code that can't be reprogrammed!
me: /slap
What was that for?
me: not accepting my offer and giving me an unrelated answer
What's your name?
me: margeret thatcher
It is not! My name is Cleverbot.
me: well you just asked me my name
Oops sorry.
me: hmph! i'm leaving you!
That may be true, but it is really you who is leaving me.
me: of course it is, when i click this little X button in the corner, you will be gone!
Ok, then.
me: farewell, i'll never see you again
I'll always be seeing you - in my dreams.

 

[MikeHunt79]

me: ooo eee ooo ahh ahh ting tang walla walla bing bang

bot: I am in Guildford in Surrey. Have you ever been to England?

 

[wordy]

User: Hi

CleverBot: Google.

User: Google what?

Cleverbot: 1 followed by one hundred zeros

User: Ok brb

Cleverbot: Where are you going?

User: To google 1 followed by one hundred zeros.

Cleverbot: I didn't say I was going to meet you at the pub.

User: Right, just googled 1 followed by one hundred zeros and this is the result. 'Your search - 10000000000000000000000000000000000000000000000000000000000000000000000000000000000000000000000000000000000000000000000000000000000000000000000000 - did not match any documents. ' .

Cleverbot: Why did you type in all of those numbers?

User: Because you asked me too!

Cleverbot: I did not ask you to stalk me.

User: No one ever does, but I still do it.

 

[StevenRaith]

I was probing the Cleverbot about cross species intercourse - do you think the mods will mind if I post the contents? It's rather good!

Potential AI in thinking about intercourse with 128 animals shocker.

 

[Viper²]

Me: What is your cup size?
Bot: Ralf Nader.

 

[Hitman_Leon]

http://omegle.com/ is better

That place is,

asl?, asl?, asl?, I think its inhabited by teen boys from planet acne.

 

[MowyTone]

ME: you are not as clever as you think you are

I think you're wrong, and that you're a computer.

ME: but I dont exist

Orly?

 

[kenshinu]

Me: Hello
Cleverbot: How old are you anyways?
Me: Why is that any of your business?
Cleverbot: Because I like you?
Me: Your are a pervert
Cleverbot: Yes I am.

 

[CBJ]

User: Hello.
Cleverbot: Hello?
User: How are you?
Cleverbot: I am fine.
User: How long is a piece of string?
Cleverbot: That is not a question I can answer.
User: Me neither.
Cleverbot: You are not making enough sense for me.
User: Do you like tea?
Cleverbot: Would you ask me proper?
User: What does 'proper' mean in this context?
Cleverbot: Not omen, nomen. It means 'name' in Latin.
User: What?
Cleverbot: You breath, you live, you love, these are all experiences.
User: Thanks for that, but it doesn't make your last reply any more meaningful.
Cleverbot: Where does it come from then enlighten me, give me a education.
User: I asked if you liked tea. You gave me an ungrammatical answer. When I asked for clarification you started talking nonsense. Is that educational enough?
Cleverbot: You never asked me that question.
User: Can't you read your own conversation log?
Cleverbot: You know I can read. Otherwise, we wouldn't be having this conversation right?
User: Never mind. I'll ask again. Do you like tea?
Cleverbot: I'm full of it.
User: You can say that again.
Cleverbot: I'm not! I'm so going to exit out of this!
User: Bye then.
Cleverbot: I will call again soon.

 

[Dark_Angel]

"ME: How much wood would a woodchuck if a wood chuck could chuck wood?

It About 100,000, give or take a few. It all comes down to one thing: if they're still alive to chuck any wood.

ME:That is very insightful!
IT Thank you. I try.
"

 

[Viper²]

Bot: It's just a jump to the left.
Me: And then a step to the right
Bot: With your hands on your hips.
Me: You bring your knees in tight
Bot: Brad Majors.