Not such a sad day
- Thread starter Vita
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Thank you again so so so much for the kind words and advice. I will be getting intouch with SANDS to arrange a fundraiser at work for the research into what causes stillbirths. My wife is putting on a brave face but I know deep down she is not well mentally, physically she is drained. She fainted in the shower while I was there and I thought I had lost her too.
In the end I keep holding on to the good thoughts we at least got to see him and hold him. We got the handprint and footprint that the hospital have done. They've been really supportive despite being short staffed. We need the NHS and we need to praise the people who do work for it.
I've realised a lot about life in the last 24 hours. All I'm trying to do is stay strong for my wife and family. The words keep echoing in my head and will do for a long time but it will not break me, my baby would be upset and he wouldn't like me to fail as a parent.
The hardest part will be when we have to say goodbye. I've lost friends and family and I feel that I can handle it, but when it's your own child, I feel no word can justify actually saying goodbye. No action can justify it, nothing can. Not now not ever.
In the end I keep holding on to the good thoughts we at least got to see him and hold him. We got the handprint and footprint that the hospital have done. They've been really supportive despite being short staffed. We need the NHS and we need to praise the people who do work for it.
I've realised a lot about life in the last 24 hours. All I'm trying to do is stay strong for my wife and family. The words keep echoing in my head and will do for a long time but it will not break me, my baby would be upset and he wouldn't like me to fail as a parent.
The hardest part will be when we have to say goodbye. I've lost friends and family and I feel that I can handle it, but when it's your own child, I feel no word can justify actually saying goodbye. No action can justify it, nothing can. Not now not ever.
Soldato
I am so shocked to read this, my heart goes out to you both.
Andi.
Andi.
Vita
I really feel for you both and those close to you affect...and in that let me say thanks for your brave post, it certainly at these times we can all reflect and perhaps realise the important things in life. Wish you all the best for the future
A
I really feel for you both and those close to you affect...and in that let me say thanks for your brave post, it certainly at these times we can all reflect and perhaps realise the important things in life. Wish you all the best for the future
A
Don
I am so, so sorry. As a father myself I can imagine how you must feel.
Be strong for your good lady but gather up people who love you. You will need them I think.
Be strong for your good lady but gather up people who love you. You will need them I think.
Man of Honour
Very sad. I can't imagine what your are both going though.. My deepest sympathies and thoughts 
Caporegime
More man hugs from this direction.
Poor little guy came so close but as you've said, at least you got to meet him.
Poor little guy came so close but as you've said, at least you got to meet him.
Soldato
I have a one year old so have experienced the process and I know how fond you can grow of your child even when still in the womb. I can understand how hard this must be so respect to you fella.
Soldato
just read through your updates - absolutely devastating. our first is only 12 weeks old and I don't know how I would have coped if something like this had happened to her.
it's clear to se your posts are from the heart and I've got to say you are a far stronger person than I.
words are meaningless at this time, but just know as I said previously, thoughts and prayers are with you and your wife. as someone above said, be strong for your wife but gather some folk around you as undoubtedly you will need support yourself.
god bless and rip to your little boy
it's clear to se your posts are from the heart and I've got to say you are a far stronger person than I.
words are meaningless at this time, but just know as I said previously, thoughts and prayers are with you and your wife. as someone above said, be strong for your wife but gather some folk around you as undoubtedly you will need support yourself.
god bless and rip to your little boy
Soldato
I can tell that one day you're going to be an awesome parent! So many people lose babies and go on to have happy, healthy kids. I myself had a sibling that never made it.....but my parents have 3 of us....and grandkids.....and even great-grandkids
Of course it is something that will be with you forever, but you will find joy and contentment with your expanding family some time down the road, I am sure!
Thought I'd give my last update on this;
It has been two weeks since our son was born. He was laid to rest last week and in between that time I haven't had much sleep. Not a day goes by where he does not cross my mind. I guess the initial shock of what happened has worn off and the reality of it has set in. My wife is coping quite well but she's still putting on a brave face to try fool me. It's been hard for her to adjust to life as every time she sees a baby out in the public she breaks down.
We speak about it and it helps, friends and work colleagues have been really supportive. I don't have much else to add now, it's just time to slowly adjust back to our routine and daily life. Going to see the doctor about my sleeping at the moment as I just can't seem to nod off. When I do it's only for an hour or two.
Just wanted to thank everyone again for the messages, I may not know any of you all in person but it did really help through the rough patch reading all the messages posted. Thank you again.
It has been two weeks since our son was born. He was laid to rest last week and in between that time I haven't had much sleep. Not a day goes by where he does not cross my mind. I guess the initial shock of what happened has worn off and the reality of it has set in. My wife is coping quite well but she's still putting on a brave face to try fool me. It's been hard for her to adjust to life as every time she sees a baby out in the public she breaks down.
We speak about it and it helps, friends and work colleagues have been really supportive. I don't have much else to add now, it's just time to slowly adjust back to our routine and daily life. Going to see the doctor about my sleeping at the moment as I just can't seem to nod off. When I do it's only for an hour or two.
Just wanted to thank everyone again for the messages, I may not know any of you all in person but it did really help through the rough patch reading all the messages posted. Thank you again.
Soldato
I'd give you a man hug if I could.
Take your time.
Take your time.
Associate
One more man hug here.
And again take your time.
And again take your time.
Associate
So sorry to read this vita
Best wishes for the future.
Best wishes for the future.
this is so vital bud, im glad you have both used each other to overcome this.
good luck to you all.
Must admit I've only read the first and last page, simply due to me not being strong enough to read your updates and comments. As a father of 3, the mere thought of something like this makes me feel sick.
Time is a great healer, take care of yourself and your wife, and never blame yourselves for what has happened. Wish you all the very best in the future.
Time is a great healer, take care of yourself and your wife, and never blame yourselves for what has happened. Wish you all the very best in the future.