Soldato
The trick is to never let your wife and your girlfriend meet
The trick is to get them to meet
MW
The trick is to never let your wife and your girlfriend meet
Stay single. It's a wise buisness move as you'll have more money to spend yourself. At least that's what I keep telling myself .
I feel ya'
What do you do, Hamish?
Exactly! The only problem will be if he's had boundaries like EU's and closes them, there will be LOTS of drama, but I believe in OP, he's made the first step
So far my marriage and my relationship with my children on the back of my self employment has been a mixed bag. Both positive and negative.
The positive difference is the day to day flexibility. I am not tied down to a colleague's perception of when and where I should be at any time. My time is driven by my clients and fortunately most of my work can take place on my mobile and my laptop/tablet without the need of necesarily spending 12 hours a day in my office.
So if the wife wants me to go a one of our children's school presentations....I can go. If she wants me to pick up the children from school....I can go. I am also not necessarily bound by the holiday limitations etc (as long as my people are in place to make sure it all happens in my absence)
My other half is generally great.
She can see the upsides and tbh it means she doesn't have to work much.
As others have mentioned the flexible time/days off are good, but I also sometimes have to go to work or work at night & on holidays at the most inconvenient times.
She didn't even moan when I spent most of one holiday in the hotel room on the phone/laptop as it was a project that would guarantee that good holidays would continue & it just happened it had to be sorted at that time.
She worked for me though so I guess she knew what it would be like.
You miss the point.
Boundaries are fine.
Being totalitarian and uncompromising is not.
Those with soft boundaries get manipulated and end up as door mats. DND me when I am working unless it's an emergency is sensible, totalitarian or not.
Being uncompromising in a relationship is tantamount to emotional abuse.
No one is suggesting you roll over for every want, but refusing to listen to your partner or worse, completely dismissing their concerns in a bid to be 'alpha' is incredibly toxic and unhealthy.
You reap what you sow.