New Star Trek series - 2017
- Thread starter Spit
- Start date
Because it seems Alex Kurtzman has a picture of the head of CBS in a gimp suit getting spanked by a transsexual midget he uses as leverage to get into every Trek project. Usually met with a "meh" response yet he still gets the job.
Soldato
Haven't watched Lower Decks, whats it airing on?
Its not got an international carrier yet.
The show was originally due to air after Discovery Season 3, but got moved up due to COVID and Discovery not being finished. So they don't yet have an international broadcaster.
Next week is the Lower Decks season finale.
The show was originally due to air after Discovery Season 3, but got moved up due to COVID and Discovery not being finished. So they don't yet have an international broadcaster.
Next week is the Lower Decks season finale.
Soldato
Lower decks is the only Star Trek I have no desire to even give it a chance. After Picard, I think I'm done with Kurtzman's Star Trek.
Kurtzman had little or nothing at all to do with Lower Decks. It sticks to established canon really well and includes a lot of the things people enjoyed. ToS ships actually look like they are supposed to. DS9 even shows up in a character flash back. Honestly its gotten really enjoyable.
Soldato
Well...it's back.
And I'm gonna comment on it, while consuming scotch.
"But why JRS, when you don't even like the show?"
Because **** you, that's why
Spoiler tags, because I'm at least vaguely house-trained.
And I'm gonna comment on it, while consuming scotch.
"But why JRS, when you don't even like the show?"
Because **** you, that's why
Spoiler tags, because I'm at least vaguely house-trained.
"That Hope Is You, Part 1"...oh puh-leeze...
1) Oh God, why do a recap? Especially why do a recap of something that was all hole and no plot?
2) *hums 'Careless Whisper' to himself when Bonehead and Tilly hold hands*
3) Time has only made me less fond of Ethan Peck as Spock. That may be a bad omen for the Pike series.
4) They really did want to make a Marvel Cinematic Universe movie, didn't they? Instead, they ended up here.
5) *hums Dr Who theme to himself*
6) Future alarm clock! With holographic bird! Why, you ask? Good question.
7) Minimalist bedroom. Because it's the future.
8) Laser teeth cleaning. Because it's the future.
9) Nanotech furniture. Because it's the future.
10) Rinse, repeat?
11) Yep.
12) "Searching for signals". Yes, and that will have been in vain. Right up until the USS Discoball blasts in from the past, won't it?
13) On the plus side, Adil Hussain perfected his 'thousand yard stare' for this role.
14) Cut to next scene, and the VFX team doing what they do best - ripping off Star Wars space battles. Open mind has firmly snapped shut I'm afraid.
15) New black guy, played by David Ajala, so at least we've found Bonehead's potential love interest/potential nemesis going forward. Because this show is still written by complete hacks.
16) It really wants to be Star Wars. Right down to the 'cool, scrappy cargo pilot' bit with Ajala's character.
17) Space/time anomaly detected. So either the TARDIS is coming through, which would be at least vaguely fun. Or it's Timesuit Iron Bonehead and/or the Discoball.
18) Oh, what a shame. It was Bonehead. And barely seconds into this time period she's managed to screw up someone's day by smashing the black dude's ship. It's a peculiar talent that she has, this.
19) Please tell me all the trailers lied, and she's about to burn up in the atmosphere of this planet.
20) Again, what a shame. Looks like she's made it through the atmosphere intact. Maybe the ground will get her.
21) There's a fire...this is promising...
22) Drat, no such luck. She lived. Still, at least it appears to have hurt.
23) Suit off, first things first - call the ship. Which the VFX team haven't animated yet, so it won't answer her. Bonehead doesn't know this of course, though she probably ought to have guessed since she hasn't finished sending the signal(s) back through time yet.
24) "Identify space/time location!" Yeah, because exactly where and when you are is the important bit right now. Not where the nearest food and water supply might be
25) 3188 then, from 2257. Though the computer notably ignoring the rest of her question, so she still doesn't know where she is. Computers of course being notorious for simply ignoring the bits of your question that aren't going to be plot relevant for a few minutes yet...
26) "Multiple life signs detected". And Bonehead is overjoyed at this. Me, I'd be making sure that they were friendly before I jumped for joy, but what the hell.
27) She's just remembered the rest of what she was supposed to do. We knew she'd already done so, because of predestination paradoxes and the like. But they still needed to fill screentime with her doing it, because audiences need to be beaten over the head with superfluous detail. So...*shrug*
28) I expect Bonehead falling to her knees and sobbing is supposed to evoke sympathy. It really doesn't.
29) Madness mantra. Name and rank, posting, serial number. Because they really needed to pad this episode with something, and this was the only padding that they could come up with.
30) Best go find the guy whose ship you clattered into, eh?
31) Almost ten minutes of this rubbish, and all we win for putting up with it is the only intro and theme more boring than that of Star Trek: Picard...
32) Y'know, normally I could tear up at the Courage fanfare playing. Tacked on the end of this intro, it just feels completely out of place.
33) I'm not sure how long it's supposed to have taken Bonehead to hike to the crash site of David Ajala's ship. But with a busted hip, and the other traumas associated with the jump through time, you'd have thought it would have taken longer given how far it looked in the wide shot pre-credits. Hey ho.
34) Ship cloaked, Ajala's character straight on the attack. Now, he's a good bit taller than her. And beefier. And less obviously injured. Which way d'you reckon this is going?
35) Dumb duologue is dumb.
36) So of course she has him at gunpoint, and hasn't already been beaten into a fine organic paste. How could she lose the fight? After all, she identifies as a woman. And has Plot Protection™.
37) Dumb duologue continues to be dumb.
38) The Gorn getting a namedrop. Fanon had always posited that the Gorn were at least friendly with the Federation after the misunderstanding that formed part of the plot of "Arena" (the Original Series episode where Kirk builds a gunpowder cannon, because he's the God damned Captain
). STD showrunners apparently going a different way.
39) "Do not call me Rocketgirl". How about I call you Bonehead, Bonehead?
40) Dumb duologue persists in its dumbness.
41) At this point I'm considering ending it all just to escape. I mean, even if I turn the episode off I'll still have had ~15 minutes of this awfulness imprinted on my brain. What kind of life is that?
42) Story desperately trying to make Bonehead the hero. Because why should this episode be any different?
43) Got to somehow make out that she's a genius, so of course she instantly understands the control interface on a ship that's a thousand years past her time.
44) The dilithium needs recrystalising. This, of course, was famously impossible in Star Trek IV (where the 'current' bits were set in 2286) so at least Bonehead shouldn't know how to do that.
45) Treknobabble alive and well.
46) Kitty!
47) Almost 16 minutes in, and we finally get something amusing. "You have a very large cat." "Yes...she has a thyroid condition."
48) So Ajala's character is called Book. We ripping off Firefly now?
49) The man's helping you out Bonehead. Probably shouldn't be asking those kind of questions.
50) Again with the duologue, that's desperate to be a long time ago in a galaxy far away.
51) Trailer moment.
52) So 'the Burn' happened. Which led to the fall of the Federation.
53) All the dilithium 'went boom'. Yeah. Okay. Sure.
54) "Dilithium's the heart of every warp-capable ship." Yes, Bonehead. I'm pretty sure Book knows that, on account of him only being as stupid as the plot needs him to be. Which is considerably smarter than you.
55) *strangled screaming*
56) *more strangled screaming*
57) I'm only 21 minutes in, and this is absolute torture.
58) So, here's Mos Eisley. Or Requiem.
59) At least they appear to have resisted the temptation to wildly screw with the Andorian makeup design. Even though a jump forward of a thousand years would actually give them an opportunity do so and have it make some kind of sense. Unlike the Klingon makeup of the first two seasons, which didn't. At all.
60) She simply can't keep her mouth shut, can she?
61) Urge...to kill...rising...
62) Betrayal, or a plan? I'm becoming distrustful of 'plot' 'twists' in this dumpster fire of a show.
63) *all the strangled screaming*
64) We've gone from dumb duologue to dumb dialogue. Not an improvement, writers.
65) Oh no, this is much worse in fact. Bonehead drugged into talking more.
66) Quick return to Book, getting jumped by the guy he was running from earlier. Because this is still trying to be Star Wars when it's not trying to be a Marvel film.
67) Bonehead still yammering away.
68) On the plus side, I now get to make my customary '69' joke in a moment.
69) Nice
70) Guy threatening to cook Book's cat. Because how else are we going to know that he's the bad guy?
71) This plot is moving at the speed of stupid.
72) Guess I called it at 62).
73) So he beamed you out of the incredibly dangerous situation with him. And you're a Starfleet officer so you pretty much know that any opposing force is going to be trying to track you. First order of business? Waste time by punching the guy. The jump to the future hasn't made you any smarter, has it Bonehead?
74) And yes, rather predictably they're beaming in right after you. An event that you'd be ready for, if you weren't quite so monumentally stupid.
75) They'll still win, clearly. Because of Plot Protection™. But they really shouldn't.
76) God, how long does this episode go on for?
77) Run-and-gun comes to its all too inevitable conclusion of diving off the cliff edge and beaming out.
78) At least the water looks warm.
79) And of course she punches him again. Because she's a strong, independent woman. Who is going to snark about the gunshot that she's taken, because that will prove to the audience that she's a badass.
80) Space prayer.
81) Continuing to show her strong, independent nature by looking away while the half naked dude bandages her arm for her.
82) Oh for the love of God Bonehead, just shut up and call your God damned ship you moron.
83) Discoball not quite made it yet.
84) Book has at least worked out that she's a time traveller.
85) Some exposition, none of which I give a damn about. Even though the writers clearly wanted me to.
86) The guys from Mos Eisley caught back up at last.
87) Hey, that's fun. One of the Mos Eisley crew looks like Morn.
88) Angry space worm is angry.
89) Please say she's dead this time, please please please please...
90) God damnit
91) Got his ship flying again then.
92) Exposition, of sorts.
93) I'm really ready for this episode to be over.
94) More exposition.
95) Back to Adil Hussain's character.
96) "Welcome to Starfleet."
97) Three quarters of an hour in, and someone is finally pleased to see Bonehead.
98) Exposition. Still don't care.
99) Sahil (Hussain's character) not in fact a Starfleet officer then.
100) Trailer moment.
101) Time to raise the flag.
102) *retch*
103) Well, thank God that's over.
104) Oh good. A season preview. Just what I wanted.
***
A less-than promising start then. Hey ho.
1) Oh God, why do a recap? Especially why do a recap of something that was all hole and no plot?
2) *hums 'Careless Whisper' to himself when Bonehead and Tilly hold hands*
3) Time has only made me less fond of Ethan Peck as Spock. That may be a bad omen for the Pike series.
4) They really did want to make a Marvel Cinematic Universe movie, didn't they? Instead, they ended up here.
5) *hums Dr Who theme to himself*
6) Future alarm clock! With holographic bird! Why, you ask? Good question.
7) Minimalist bedroom. Because it's the future.
8) Laser teeth cleaning. Because it's the future.
9) Nanotech furniture. Because it's the future.
10) Rinse, repeat?
11) Yep.
12) "Searching for signals". Yes, and that will have been in vain. Right up until the USS Discoball blasts in from the past, won't it?
13) On the plus side, Adil Hussain perfected his 'thousand yard stare' for this role.
14) Cut to next scene, and the VFX team doing what they do best - ripping off Star Wars space battles. Open mind has firmly snapped shut I'm afraid.
15) New black guy, played by David Ajala, so at least we've found Bonehead's potential love interest/potential nemesis going forward. Because this show is still written by complete hacks.
16) It really wants to be Star Wars. Right down to the 'cool, scrappy cargo pilot' bit with Ajala's character.
17) Space/time anomaly detected. So either the TARDIS is coming through, which would be at least vaguely fun. Or it's Timesuit Iron Bonehead and/or the Discoball.
18) Oh, what a shame. It was Bonehead. And barely seconds into this time period she's managed to screw up someone's day by smashing the black dude's ship. It's a peculiar talent that she has, this.
19) Please tell me all the trailers lied, and she's about to burn up in the atmosphere of this planet.
20) Again, what a shame. Looks like she's made it through the atmosphere intact. Maybe the ground will get her.
21) There's a fire...this is promising...
22) Drat, no such luck. She lived. Still, at least it appears to have hurt.
23) Suit off, first things first - call the ship. Which the VFX team haven't animated yet, so it won't answer her. Bonehead doesn't know this of course, though she probably ought to have guessed since she hasn't finished sending the signal(s) back through time yet.
24) "Identify space/time location!" Yeah, because exactly where and when you are is the important bit right now. Not where the nearest food and water supply might be
25) 3188 then, from 2257. Though the computer notably ignoring the rest of her question, so she still doesn't know where she is. Computers of course being notorious for simply ignoring the bits of your question that aren't going to be plot relevant for a few minutes yet...
26) "Multiple life signs detected". And Bonehead is overjoyed at this. Me, I'd be making sure that they were friendly before I jumped for joy, but what the hell.
27) She's just remembered the rest of what she was supposed to do. We knew she'd already done so, because of predestination paradoxes and the like. But they still needed to fill screentime with her doing it, because audiences need to be beaten over the head with superfluous detail. So...*shrug*
28) I expect Bonehead falling to her knees and sobbing is supposed to evoke sympathy. It really doesn't.
29) Madness mantra. Name and rank, posting, serial number. Because they really needed to pad this episode with something, and this was the only padding that they could come up with.
30) Best go find the guy whose ship you clattered into, eh?
31) Almost ten minutes of this rubbish, and all we win for putting up with it is the only intro and theme more boring than that of Star Trek: Picard...
32) Y'know, normally I could tear up at the Courage fanfare playing. Tacked on the end of this intro, it just feels completely out of place.
33) I'm not sure how long it's supposed to have taken Bonehead to hike to the crash site of David Ajala's ship. But with a busted hip, and the other traumas associated with the jump through time, you'd have thought it would have taken longer given how far it looked in the wide shot pre-credits. Hey ho.
34) Ship cloaked, Ajala's character straight on the attack. Now, he's a good bit taller than her. And beefier. And less obviously injured. Which way d'you reckon this is going?
35) Dumb duologue is dumb.
36) So of course she has him at gunpoint, and hasn't already been beaten into a fine organic paste. How could she lose the fight? After all, she identifies as a woman. And has Plot Protection™.
37) Dumb duologue continues to be dumb.
38) The Gorn getting a namedrop. Fanon had always posited that the Gorn were at least friendly with the Federation after the misunderstanding that formed part of the plot of "Arena" (the Original Series episode where Kirk builds a gunpowder cannon, because he's the God damned Captain
). STD showrunners apparently going a different way.39) "Do not call me Rocketgirl". How about I call you Bonehead, Bonehead?
40) Dumb duologue persists in its dumbness.
41) At this point I'm considering ending it all just to escape. I mean, even if I turn the episode off I'll still have had ~15 minutes of this awfulness imprinted on my brain. What kind of life is that?
42) Story desperately trying to make Bonehead the hero. Because why should this episode be any different?
43) Got to somehow make out that she's a genius, so of course she instantly understands the control interface on a ship that's a thousand years past her time.
44) The dilithium needs recrystalising. This, of course, was famously impossible in Star Trek IV (where the 'current' bits were set in 2286) so at least Bonehead shouldn't know how to do that.
45) Treknobabble alive and well.
46) Kitty!
47) Almost 16 minutes in, and we finally get something amusing. "You have a very large cat." "Yes...she has a thyroid condition."
48) So Ajala's character is called Book. We ripping off Firefly now?
49) The man's helping you out Bonehead. Probably shouldn't be asking those kind of questions.
50) Again with the duologue, that's desperate to be a long time ago in a galaxy far away.
51) Trailer moment.
52) So 'the Burn' happened. Which led to the fall of the Federation.
53) All the dilithium 'went boom'. Yeah. Okay. Sure.
54) "Dilithium's the heart of every warp-capable ship." Yes, Bonehead. I'm pretty sure Book knows that, on account of him only being as stupid as the plot needs him to be. Which is considerably smarter than you.
55) *strangled screaming*
56) *more strangled screaming*
57) I'm only 21 minutes in, and this is absolute torture.
58) So, here's Mos Eisley. Or Requiem.
59) At least they appear to have resisted the temptation to wildly screw with the Andorian makeup design. Even though a jump forward of a thousand years would actually give them an opportunity do so and have it make some kind of sense. Unlike the Klingon makeup of the first two seasons, which didn't. At all.
60) She simply can't keep her mouth shut, can she?
61) Urge...to kill...rising...
62) Betrayal, or a plan? I'm becoming distrustful of 'plot' 'twists' in this dumpster fire of a show.
63) *all the strangled screaming*
64) We've gone from dumb duologue to dumb dialogue. Not an improvement, writers.
65) Oh no, this is much worse in fact. Bonehead drugged into talking more.
66) Quick return to Book, getting jumped by the guy he was running from earlier. Because this is still trying to be Star Wars when it's not trying to be a Marvel film.
67) Bonehead still yammering away.
68) On the plus side, I now get to make my customary '69' joke in a moment.
69) Nice
70) Guy threatening to cook Book's cat. Because how else are we going to know that he's the bad guy?
71) This plot is moving at the speed of stupid.
72) Guess I called it at 62).
73) So he beamed you out of the incredibly dangerous situation with him. And you're a Starfleet officer so you pretty much know that any opposing force is going to be trying to track you. First order of business? Waste time by punching the guy. The jump to the future hasn't made you any smarter, has it Bonehead?
74) And yes, rather predictably they're beaming in right after you. An event that you'd be ready for, if you weren't quite so monumentally stupid.
75) They'll still win, clearly. Because of Plot Protection™. But they really shouldn't.
76) God, how long does this episode go on for?
77) Run-and-gun comes to its all too inevitable conclusion of diving off the cliff edge and beaming out.
78) At least the water looks warm.
79) And of course she punches him again. Because she's a strong, independent woman. Who is going to snark about the gunshot that she's taken, because that will prove to the audience that she's a badass.
80) Space prayer.
81) Continuing to show her strong, independent nature by looking away while the half naked dude bandages her arm for her.
82) Oh for the love of God Bonehead, just shut up and call your God damned ship you moron.
83) Discoball not quite made it yet.
84) Book has at least worked out that she's a time traveller.
85) Some exposition, none of which I give a damn about. Even though the writers clearly wanted me to.
86) The guys from Mos Eisley caught back up at last.
87) Hey, that's fun. One of the Mos Eisley crew looks like Morn.
88) Angry space worm is angry.
89) Please say she's dead this time, please please please please...
90) God damnit
91) Got his ship flying again then.
92) Exposition, of sorts.
93) I'm really ready for this episode to be over.
94) More exposition.
95) Back to Adil Hussain's character.
96) "Welcome to Starfleet."
97) Three quarters of an hour in, and someone is finally pleased to see Bonehead.
98) Exposition. Still don't care.
99) Sahil (Hussain's character) not in fact a Starfleet officer then.
100) Trailer moment.
101) Time to raise the flag.
102) *retch*
103) Well, thank God that's over.
104) Oh good. A season preview. Just what I wanted.
***
A less-than promising start then. Hey ho.
Soldato
I hope you continue to. As for me...
Clearly I'm not past how awful I thought the opening two seasons were. I was even irritated by the episode title The jump forward in time is a real opportunity though, provided that they can make it actually work. That's going to mean not telegraphing twists in advance and not having characters suffer from plot-convenient stupidity where it doesn't make sense. It's going to mean making it more of an ensemble show rather than focusing on Michael Burnham, Galactic Moron. It's going to mean that the ensemble cast are going to have to up their game and not rely on Doug Jones out-acting everyone in the same post code.
And it's going to mean that they need, need, need to sanity-check the writing once in a while. We're already on dubious ground there with this whole deal of the 'all the dilithium went boom' plot. Dilithium is the crystalline stuff that in the ST universe allows matter and antimatter to react together without simply exploding. It instead produces electroplasma, which can then run a ship's systems. Dilithium, by itself, isn't the fuel. It's never been shown as particularly reactive, per se (though TOS was occasionally confused while they nailed down how stuff worked). And yeah, so this has meant that warp drive/FTL travel has become much harder. But would it genuinely, believably lead to the fall of the Federation?
I really hope they haven't written themselves into a corner this early on.
The jump forward in time is a real opportunity though, provided that they can make it actually work. That's going to mean not telegraphing twists in advance and not having characters suffer from plot-convenient stupidity where it doesn't make sense. It's going to mean making it more of an ensemble show rather than focusing on Michael Burnham, Galactic Moron. It's going to mean that the ensemble cast are going to have to up their game and not rely on Doug Jones out-acting everyone in the same post code. And it's going to mean that they need, need, need to sanity-check the writing once in a while. We're already on dubious ground there with this whole deal of the 'all the dilithium went boom' plot. Dilithium is the crystalline stuff that in the ST universe allows matter and antimatter to react together without simply exploding. It instead produces electroplasma, which can then run a ship's systems. Dilithium, by itself, isn't the fuel. It's never been shown as particularly reactive, per se (though TOS was occasionally confused while they nailed down how stuff worked). And yeah, so this has meant that warp drive/FTL travel has become much harder. But would it genuinely, believably lead to the fall of the Federation?
I really hope they haven't written themselves into a corner this early on.
Soldato
I’m not sure wtf I watched yesterday night but it sure sounded terrific on my new Q90R soundbar and it’s rears.
The ending portion was kinda nice though. Got to see that chap getting some closure after 4 decades!
I wonder how they’ll write Burnham into saving the galaxy this season.
The ending portion was kinda nice though. Got to see that chap getting some closure after 4 decades!
I wonder how they’ll write Burnham into saving the galaxy this season.
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Soldato
Yep. Because when it's not ripping off the MCU, or Star Wars, or Andromeda it's ripping off the Red Dwarf episode "Rimmerworld"
Soldato
Quite plausible.
Yep. Because when it's not ripping off the MCU, or Star Wars, or Andromeda it's ripping off the Red Dwarf episode "Rimmerworld"
Quite true. Ha. I thought the Federation guy sitting at his desk was waiting for the Cylons to arrive, for a while there.
Man of Honour
Same.
Speakers on blast and big screen on.... Both a visual and sonic treat and looking forward to part 2 and beyond. It's certainly different, but I like it, and I've been watching Trek all the way back from the Shatner days.
Soldato
I liked it even though I’m no fan of Burnham. Saying that though....
when she was on that truth drug and smiling/laughing I actually like her. She needs to be on that all the time for me.
Soldato
Yeah I enjoyed it too, they needed a change of scenery and I felt the intro wasn't too drawn out into the idea they're in the future. The planet looked great be it CGI or on location, felt like a home like alien world but the city CGI was something from the 90s almost. Thankfully the smaller set pieces there weren't as over done.
I do have one issue though:
Also:
I do have one issue though:
She vaporised two guys under the waterfall without a care. Not very Starfleet. I felt that was unnecessary. Mindless killing was never really Star Trek
Also:
Are we assuming Book is not human? She didn't really get into asking what he is which I felt odd. For her timeline it would be considered first contact so she should have been fascinated and more procedure about it at least until she realised those days are done
Caporegime
This looks and sound glorious in 4K OLED and surround sound. Looking forward to next week!