Soldato
You will find that for the foreseeable future. Apple have done a very good job of convincing people that they want the new iPhone even though the performance of their phones in the real world hasn't improved much in years.
I have the X and its still really fast and I never notice that I am waiting for anything to happen on the phone. I would love one of the new models but I would be in the same boat as you. Underwhelmed. Lets be honest, there is a reason apple pushed 5G so heavily on the 12. It simply doesn't have much else to push over last years model. Even the case redesign is quite subtle and retains the notch.
If 5G is useful to me even in 2-3 years time I will be stunned.
To be fair, I had decided I wanted the new iPhone before they announced it, as I just wanted a camera and battery upgrade. I have no other issues with the XS Max - other than the fact there are some small faults with it (earpiece speaker doesn't work, Siri doesn't work, screen burn)
I'll be turning off 5G as I don't have any need for it