Couple of Jokes...

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Well fancy havin a lol so post some jokes and I athink it's only fair I attempt to raise a smile too so heres 2 to start.

1. 2 Irish men in a bed, 1 says to the other...





















"I don't think much of this wife swapping"





2. What you call a welshman with a stick up his bum?




















A taffy apple.




NOTE: not sposed to be offensive/racist, it's just a bit of comrardary humour.


Lets have um. :)
 
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This is working opposite, but try this...

This dog walks into this butchers and barks twice, the butchers looks and the dog swings it's head to the right. On his left ear is a note saying "half pound of streaky bacon please" on a bag kept on with an elastic band so the butcher still a bit bewildered weighs out the bacon, the dog barks again this time swingin his head to the left with another bag with money in and a note saying...

"Put change back in here" the butcher thinks "I'm in" and short changes the dog a pound, but the dog doesn't leave and barks again. The butcher thinks what a clever dog, he knows I've short changed him. The butchers impressed and puts the rest of the money in the bag and the dog leaves.

The butcher intruigued by the dog follows it all through town, over a field and eventually to a house, butcher stays close by and watches the dog put it's paw over the gate, unlock it and walk up the path.

The dog gets to the door and barks. The door opens, a man comes out and kicks the dog up the a**e

The butcher sees this and rushes towards the house.

He tells the man "This dog just came into my shop with money, notes for bacon and even knew when I short changed him!, he's bought the bacon back to you after walking through the town, over a field, opened a gate, walked to the door and barked to be let in!

Why did you kick the dog up the a**e???"

The man looks at the butcher and says...










"This is the second time this week he's forgot his key"

:D
 
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loved it...............mostly because I knew a dog that used to go out every morning to get the paper for his disabled owner. Don't think he had a front door key though.

Thanks for the smile.
 
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Tommy B said:
As this is the internet I have no reason to be embaressed but WTF I don't get the dog one. Someone explain. Might be the fact I've had too much to drink but I doubt it :(

Try again in the mornin ;)
 
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