Blocked driveway - ignorant git

Pinter75 · 23 Sep 2006 at 00:00

Q Someone has parked their car blocking my driveway, what can I do?.

A Check with neighbours or local shops to see if the driver is nearby. If not, call the local police on XXXXX XXXXXXX and have the registration number of the car concerned with you.

From the Met police FAQ. Just bell your local station - and report the incident as obstruction.

Violent-J · 23 Sep 2006 at 00:24

Grade 1: Let his tyres down.

Grade 2: Put a banana up his exhaust pipe and then a johnny on the end.

Grade 3: Get 3 slim roman candle fireworks. Insert in exhauast pipe and light.

Locky · 23 Sep 2006 at 00:25

i would get a valve remover [ i have one of these ] and remove his valves then super glue his caps back on

silversurfer · 23 Sep 2006 at 00:34

I did this once by accident. It was late at night and their gate was all black and I guess I wasnt thinking because I was tired but I didnt see the dropped kerb. It was all terraced housing apart from a couple at the end of the street like this.

So anyway I came back the next morning and the car was moved, it was such a cheap car a policeman had come along and easily got into the car and moved it and left it unlocked, nice touch. Also he left me a standard parking fine to pay. I went and apologised and never did it since

penski · 23 Sep 2006 at 00:40

Violent-J said:
Grade 1: Let his tyres down.

Grade 2: Put a banana up his exhaust pipe and then a johnny on the end.

Grade 3: Get 3 slim roman candle fireworks. Insert in exhauast pipe and light.

Stop ignoring your thread.

*n

SB118 · 23 Sep 2006 at 00:52

penski said:
Stop ignoring your thread.

*n

JediFragger · 23 Sep 2006 at 00:54

Someone's out getting pished at da pub

We're probably gonna be at Grade 3+ level due to the alcohol involved

4T5 · 23 Sep 2006 at 09:47

Place one foot on each wing facing forwards.
Drop trousers.
Crap on Windscreen.
Go back indoors feeling Mighty saticfied

NeilMick · 23 Sep 2006 at 09:55

malc30 said:
Place one foot on each wing facing forwards.
Drop trousers.
Crap on Windscreen.
Go back indoors feeling Mighty saticfied

You need help

Duke · 23 Sep 2006 at 10:39

So.. what happened then??

Old Wino · 23 Sep 2006 at 10:40

Usher · 23 Sep 2006 at 10:52

poke a load of stones down his exhaust pipe & when he drives of it'll drive him insane & spend a fortune at his local garage trying to find out whats causing the noise , similar fun can be had with stones under hubcaps

triggerthat · 23 Sep 2006 at 11:05

Old Wino said:
what about:

unscrew number plates
attach to mates car
find some speed cameras
put plates back

For the win!!

n3vrmind · 23 Sep 2006 at 11:23

triggerthat said:
For the win!!

Provided he has a mate with a discovery, wouldnt work too well if he asks for photos or if the police check that its the right type of car

Sirrel Squirrel · 23 Sep 2006 at 11:29

I once blocked someones drive while I went to knock for a mate, I was only going to be there for 30 seconds tops, as I got out and approached my mates house, her neighbor's door flies open and a big dog comes running at me, I stood my ground as dogs don't frighten me in the slightest, it didn't do anything except bark. The woman then came out and said 'you're not parking there are you?' I said I was going to be a few seconds while picking my mate up, she replied that she had to go out in 10 minutes, just got into a massive argument that it wouldn't inconvenience her as I'd be gone in a matter of seconds but she just kept going mad at me, couple of seconds latter my mate comes out and gets in my car, I follow and drive away. Some people go way ott lol.

dilated · 23 Sep 2006 at 11:45

Sirrel Squirrel said:
I once blocked someones drive while I went to knock for a mate, I was only going to be there for 30 seconds tops, as I got out and approached my mates house, her neighbor's door flies open and a big dog comes running at me, I stood my ground as dogs don't frighten me in the slightest, it didn't do anything except bark. The woman then came out and said 'you're not parking there are you?' I said I was going to be a few seconds while picking my mate up, she replied that she had to go out in 10 minutes, just got into a massive argument that it wouldn't inconvenience her as I'd be gone in a matter of seconds but she just kept going mad at me, couple of seconds latter my mate comes out and gets in my car, I follow and drive away. Some people go way ott lol.

the moral of the story is - an englishmans home is his castle. dont mess with it!

Enfield · 23 Sep 2006 at 13:07

So what did you do?

michael baxter · 23 Sep 2006 at 13:19

thepharcyde said:
let the air out of all four tyres then superglue the caps back on. Then hide i guess

Better still, loosen the valve centres and let the tyres go flat. When he comes to pump them up, they will go back down until he then finds another a valve removal tool or removes them and takes them to a garage.

Ideally, at least two tyres should be let down, on opposite corners. This makes it difficult to remove both tyres (assuming only one jack) and take it to a garage.

It will take a while for it to be sorted. Perhaps you could even extort some money at the same time?

No permanent damage too!

oxygene · 23 Sep 2006 at 13:24

if ever there was a time to buy a police stinger set it was now...

Shoseki · 23 Sep 2006 at 13:32

Get it towed tbh.