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Advice request

Discussion in 'General Discussion' started by Chris Beard, 2 Aug 2018.

  1. Chris Beard

    Wise Guy

    Joined: 17 Apr 2006

    Posts: 1,754

    Hi OCUK,

    Should I take a big pay cut to spend more time with my young family?

    I have three options:
    1. Stay at my current job [edit: That requires travel Mon-Thur/Fri every week] where I'm likely to be promoted and looked after
    2. Go to another job that requires travel and be paid maybe 15% more
    3. Go to another job that doesn't require travel and pays 20%+ less

    I'm erring towards 3. We have two young children and I'm hoping to convince the wife to go for a third soon. We can likely afford option 3, but it means a hit to our living standards and a significant drop to my pension contributions.

    Cheers,
    Chris
     
    Last edited: 2 Aug 2018
  2. Dis86

    Suspended

    Joined: 23 Dec 2011

    Posts: 26,261

    Location: Northern England

    What's wrong with 1
     
  3. TheOracle

    Capodecina

    Joined: 30 Sep 2005

    Posts: 13,202

    1
     
  4. FortuitousFluke

    Mobster

    Joined: 7 Jul 2011

    Posts: 4,256

    Location: Cambridgeshire

    Nobody here can really give you the answer to this one, I mean we're great at the "My boss has started stroking my neck and suggested transitioning me to a contract where i'm paid in "favours", should I move to this new job that pays 1000% more?" questions, but this one is a bit more nuanced.

    It's really down to what you value and the current position you find yourself in, here are a few questions I'd be asking myself:

    1. In terms of work life balance and career progression where do I see myself in the short, medium, and long term. Which option gets me there.
    2. Which role would I enjoy more?
    3. How much do I need the money, spending time with the family is great but not if you have trouble making ends meet.
    4. If I need the money, can this be addressed comfortably by finding other earning streams or cutting back?
    5. How much time would I lose with my family if I went for the more extreme option? What would the impact be and can I live with it?
    6. And most importantly to an extent, how do my family feel about my options.
    Sorry I can't help more bud, I recently took a job for better money and prospects with increased stress and travel, however I don't have kids so it was an easier call, but it's still had an impact on quality of life and time with my wife. In the long term I think it will work out but for some added pain in the short term.
     
  5. Sindri

    Hitman

    Joined: 7 Jul 2009

    Posts: 597

    Depends on how much you earn really. If you earn 100k and lose 20% its not the end of the world, as you will still be well off.
    If you earn say 30k then that 20% could have a much bigger impact on your standard of living.
     
  6. Chris Beard

    Wise Guy

    Joined: 17 Apr 2006

    Posts: 1,754

    1. Career Progression probably about the same, work-life option 3 will be the best in short, medium and long term
    2. Probably the higher paying option at a new role that requires travel, but I don't relish missing my kids growing up
    3. I don't need the money, but hey - it's nice
    4. Yes, there's another fully capable adult at home that's just a wee bit busy breastfeeding right now
    5. Significant - not home Mon-Thurs, maybe also Fri. Waking up at 3pm every Monday and feeling like Heathrow is more home than home. My colleague told me a story where his 4 year old boy begged him not to leave, then once my colleague explained his boy went off to get his coat and said he was coming along. I really don't want that (well, unless I can actually bring the rugrats to work!).
    6. My wife is on-board with us cutting back so that I can come home at night, I don't think she wants me to keep travelling for work. The boys are too small to venture an opinion. My Dad thinks I'm a Muppet for even considering moving away from my current career path.
     
  7. jsmoke

    Capodecina

    Joined: 17 Jun 2012

    Posts: 10,027

    Obviously your decision but to me 1 seems the obvious choice. What's your mortgage status, how much in savings do you have, any investments, how skilled is your job etc.

    I don't expect you say on this forum however points to think about.
     
  8. Chris Beard

    Wise Guy

    Joined: 17 Apr 2006

    Posts: 1,754

    Not one, nor the other. I'm already putting 20% of my salary into my pension however, as I can't find anything more useful to do with it.
     
  9. Scam

    Capodecina

    Joined: 20 Oct 2002

    Posts: 14,193

    Location: London

    When you say travel do you mean a commute, or actual travel every week? :confused:

    #1 still sounds alright. If a promotion is in the works then you'd expect a payrise with it anyway. Decent companies are worth sticking with, in my opinion.
     
  10. Martynt74

    Capodecina

    Joined: 20 Feb 2004

    Posts: 16,068

    Location: Higher Walton

    I'm assuming actual travel if he feels like Heathrow is more his home
     
  11. Chris Beard

    Wise Guy

    Joined: 17 Apr 2006

    Posts: 1,754

    International travel, away from home Mon-Thurs/Fri
     
  12. FortuitousFluke

    Mobster

    Joined: 7 Jul 2011

    Posts: 4,256

    Location: Cambridgeshire

    With what you've mentioned above and given you've previously mentioned your current work will look after you and promotion is an option I'd be inclined to stay put, at least for a while. I'd probably re-assess once the kids are a bit older.

    It's your call man and even with hindsight there are no really wrong options, just different levels of adaption.
     
  13. sovietspybob

    Mobster

    Joined: 25 May 2008

    Posts: 2,942

    Location: North Wales

    For me personally no 3 all day long, i'd want to spend as much time as possible with my family as you just can't get that time back and no amount of shiny presents for your kids with your extra money will ever make up for you not being there for them when they need you.
     
  14. Rich1988

    Soldato

    Joined: 8 Jan 2005

    Posts: 6,373

    Location: wiltshire

    if you can afford it number 3. Always would take family time/being at home over extra pay any day. with the caveat that it wouldn't degrade my quality of life too much because of the pay cut. It's a balancing act, but if you have done the sums then number 3 would be my choice.
     
  15. randomshenans

    Capodecina

    Joined: 11 Sep 2009

    Posts: 12,323

    Location: France, Alsace

    What is it you do?
     
  16. BigT

    Mobster

    Joined: 18 Oct 2002

    Posts: 3,247

    Location: UK

    No one will be able to give you the answer to this. When I was young I'd have said 1. However now I'm older in recent years I had a situation where my wife and I decided consciously to go to one salary and enjoy more time together. Don't get me wrong I'm still very lucky to have a lovely lifestyle but we have given up on foreign holidays, splurging on clothes and stuff as a consequence but I couldn't be happier. But that doesn't mean it would have been what's right for someone else.

    Pick what is most important to you and make your choice.
     
  17. Josh

    Capodecina

    Joined: 23 Oct 2013

    Posts: 10,374

    Location: Surrey

    Family time - you can't get it back.
     
  18. Chris Beard

    Wise Guy

    Joined: 17 Apr 2006

    Posts: 1,754

    IT Project Management for large scale SAP Transformation Programmes
     
  19. Chris Beard

    Wise Guy

    Joined: 17 Apr 2006

    Posts: 1,754

    This was useful, thank you
     
  20. Chris Beard

    Wise Guy

    Joined: 17 Apr 2006

    Posts: 1,754

    I look at my colleagues and I can see the regret in their posture and hear it in their voices. I think I need to get out.