Blackadder Quotes - Help please

Wryel · 23 Mar 2006 at 00:53

tb2000 said:
Blackadder: Come on, the moment that collection of inbred mutants you call your relatives heard you were sick, they'll have sent you a hamper the size of Westminster Abbey.
George: My family is not inbred!
Blackadder: Come on - somewhere outside Saffron Walden there's an uncle who's seven feet tall with no chin and an Adam's Apple that makes him look as though he's constantly trying to swallow a ballcock.
George: I have not got an uncles like that - and anyway, he lives in Walton -on-the-Naze.
Blackadder: Exactly. Now where's the grub?

I've been to Walton-on-the-Naze!!! Its a mess of pregnant single mums!! And chinless ballcock swallowing goons.

DRZ · 23 Mar 2006 at 00:58

Am I jumping the gun, Baldrick, or are the words 'I have a cunning plan' marching with ill-deserved confidence in the direction of this conversation?

NeedleGunner · 23 Mar 2006 at 01:05

BrenOS said:
Bernard?

My name's not Nursey it's Bernard

Cybermyk · 23 Mar 2006 at 01:19

Queenie: I know why you want to get out of it, because I remember the last time you had a party, I found you face down in a puddle wearing a pointy hat and singing a song about goblins.

Creature · 23 Mar 2006 at 02:00

Blackadder: I know from long experience all my men have the artistic talent of a cluster of colour-blind hedgehogs............in a bag

Baldrick: BOOM BOOM BOOM BOOM.....BOOM BOOM BOOM.....BOOM BOOM BOOM BOOM...
Blackadder: Boom boom boom?

Akira · 23 Mar 2006 at 06:28

Bob Parkhurst: I want to see how a war is fought, so badly.
Captain Blackadder: Well, you've come to the right place, Bob. A war hasn't been fought this badly since Olaf the Hairy, high chief of all the vikings, accidentally ordered 80,000 battle helmets with the horns on the inside.

Q.U.A.L.I.T.Y.

Balders · 23 Mar 2006 at 08:09

Nursey: I was so clever one day, my foot fell off!

ScarySquirrel · 23 Mar 2006 at 08:27

Akira said:
Bob Parkhurst: I want to see how a war is fought, so badly.
Captain Blackadder: Well, you've come to the right place, Bob. A war hasn't been fought this badly since Olaf the Hairy, high chief of all the vikings, accidentally ordered 80,000 battle helmets with the horns on the inside.

Q.U.A.L.I.T.Y.

This one was on UKTV Golad last night, got a real lol from me

jpmonkey69 · 23 Mar 2006 at 08:30

"I am anaspeptic, phrasmotic, even compunctious to have caused you such periconbobulations."

When Dr. Johnson shows the Prince Regent and EB his new Dictionary.

wordy · 23 Mar 2006 at 08:39

Jumpingmedic said:
Baldrick:
What, have you got a plan, my lord?

Edmund:
Yes, I have. And it's so cunning you could brush your teeth with it!

Flibster said:
Blackadder: I've got a plan so cunning, you could put a tail on it & call it a weasel.

Two of the best T.V quotes I've ever heard

Irish_Tom · 23 Mar 2006 at 10:57

Old Hag: The Wise Woman? The Wise Woman? Two things my lord must ye know of the Wise Woman!
EB: Yes
Old Hag: First, she is a Woman! Second she is...
EB: Wise?
Old Hag: So you do know her then?
EB: No no, just a wild stab in the dark which incidently is what you're going to be getting if you don't start being a bit more helpful. Do you know where she lives?
Old Hag: Of course.
EB: Where?
Old Hag: Here (points to house)
EB: Thank you young crone, here is a purse of monnies... which I'm not going to give to you.

Sorry if its not word perfect its all from memory....

Panzer