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Cheating

Discussion in 'General Discussion' started by qwerty, 22 May 2006.

  1. qwerty

    Wise Guy

    Joined: 27 Jul 2005

    Posts: 2,351

    I searched and there doesn't seem to be a cheating thread on here. I just want to know peoples opinions on it.

    Should you tell the people involved, or try to keep it secret forever?
    If people get suspicious should you come clean or go deeper with the lies?
    Is it ever justifiable?
    How do I stop thinking about it and how bad a person I am?

    :(
     
  2. Zefan

    Don

    Joined: 15 Jan 2006

    Posts: 30,318

    Location: Tosche Station

    Kill yourself.

    No, NEVER justifiable.
     
  3. lemonkettaz

    Capodecina

    Joined: 28 Nov 2005

    Posts: 11,819

    its a tough one.. can you justify it..?...

    it depends.. i mean if you are cheating because you have fallen in love with someone else.. then maybe you have something to stand on...

    if its just cheating for no real reason but pleasure.. then.. nah.

    either way, tell the truth asap
     
  4. DaveyD

    Man of Honour

    Joined: 19 Jan 2003

    Posts: 12,647

    Location: Warwickshire

    I'd have thought telling the other person involved would be the main point, let them break up with you.

    If you feel bad, just think what they're going to feel when they find out what you're doing to them.

    In my opinion, it's never justifiable. If you have the need to do such a thing, something is up in your relationship, and you either need to break it off or talk things over and fix the issues, and then move on.
     
  5. KaHn

    Capodecina

    Joined: 13 Oct 2004

    Posts: 13,177

    Location: South Shields

    Was a big thread a while ago.

    KaHn
     
  6. qwerty

    Wise Guy

    Joined: 27 Jul 2005

    Posts: 2,351

    That's the problem, there are no issues. I was just being completely absolutely stupid. But there's no way I could tell my gf - one of her best friends got cheated on and some of the things my gf said after that mean that she can never find out about this. ever. things were so good, I'm just worried I've ruined it by being selfish.
     
  7. Mekrel

    Soldato

    Joined: 2 Aug 2004

    Posts: 6,891

    Location: Buckinghamshire

    Tell them because it make the person who is being cheated on look and feel so stupid when they find out via another means.

    I'm speaking from experience here, a girl used me, took everything from me and went onto someone else at the click of a finger, when she said she really wanted to make a go at things, but she knew she would risk her education to be with me.

    Everytime I speak to her, she just lies to me and I feel like such an idiot and she tried to turn the tables around on me. Saying that she only did what she did because of how her previous partner hurt her.

    Yet thats just the whimps way out, she doesn't want to admit she is wrong so she plays the "I'm the vicitim" card, but it's no excuse.

    I now hate her, and couldn't care less if she ended up under the front two wheel of a bus.
     
  8. Zefan

    Don

    Joined: 15 Jan 2006

    Posts: 30,318

    Location: Tosche Station

    You have been selfish and yes you have ruined it.

    BE A MAN and deal with the responsibility you've given yourself of telling her the truth.

    DO IT NOW.
     
  9. agw_01

    Capodecina

    Joined: 11 Apr 2004

    Posts: 19,690

    I cheated because I knew the relationship wasn't going to last.

    Did I like the girl I cheated with? No

    Did I like the girl I cheated on? Yes

    Would I do it again? If I was in the same situation, probably.

    But if I was with someone who I genuinely cared for and knew there was some sort of a future, then there's absolutely no chance that I would cheat.

    I'm not proud of what I did, and still wish I hadn't... but I'm pretty sure my ex cheated on me.

    Cheating on someone is a way of getting out of the relationship. You're lying to yourself if you continue to carry on the relationship. My advice is... get out and find someone you REALLY want to be with.
     
  10. Raikiri

    Capodecina

    Joined: 5 Jul 2005

    Posts: 17,481

    Location: Brighton


    You got your Bus drivers license yet? (j/k)


    On a more serious note, tell them. Chances are they will find out at some point and it could be a lot worse.
     
  11. qwerty

    Wise Guy

    Joined: 27 Jul 2005

    Posts: 2,351

    That's the position I was in - and I thought there was absolutely no chance I would cheat.

    I barely even remember it I was so blind drunk. I can't drink in sensible amounts, maybe I should get that seen to as well.
     
  12. qwerty

    Wise Guy

    Joined: 27 Jul 2005

    Posts: 2,351

    I think it's too late to tell her. It's complicated, but it just is too late.
     
  13. Zefan

    Don

    Joined: 15 Jan 2006

    Posts: 30,318

    Location: Tosche Station

    You did it, therefore you have to deal with the consequences. There's no point pussyfooting around - just own up and move on. The one you've cheated on is blatantly not your "one" so just give it up.
     
  14. Zefan

    Don

    Joined: 15 Jan 2006

    Posts: 30,318

    Location: Tosche Station

    You can always take rings back ;)
     
  15. Leahfd

    Gangster

    Joined: 14 Feb 2006

    Posts: 150

    I think you should tell the person involved but... we very rarely do. They tend to find out themselves, they feel it and such like dont they?

    Its a big weight to carry all them lies, come clean :) Easier said than done though.

    Is it justifiable? Thats a hard one to answer.
    I would say no but, i know how these things happen.

    You need to ask yourself the reason why this has happened in the first place, find yourself some answers and give yourself some time.
    Remember, nobodies perfect and sometimes these things happen for a reason.
     
  16. ballistic

    PermaBanned

    Joined: 15 May 2006

    Posts: 2,278

    Be a man, shag them both and continue to do it until one of them finds out. Cover your tracks and make sure that it doesn't happen, when you're bored with both dump the uglier one :D
     
  17. qwerty

    Wise Guy

    Joined: 27 Jul 2005

    Posts: 2,351

    I was impressed at all the sensible answers so far. Thanks. :(
     
  18. Rich_L

    Capodecina

    Joined: 18 Oct 2002

    Posts: 18,170

    Location: Santa Barbara, Californee

    If you are unable to dismiss it and forget about it, you feel it has made you question your commitment and your relationship with her, or there is a chance of her finding out then you should tell her.

    Otherwise just forget it ever happened, if it isn't affecting you or your relationship with her, and she won't ever find out then it'll just cause her (and therefore you) grief which could easily be avoided.

    *edit*
    It'll also be a good banker if she cheats on you, as you got in there first.. :p
     
    Last edited: 22 May 2006
  19. ballistic

    PermaBanned

    Joined: 15 May 2006

    Posts: 2,278

    why is that not sensible? how do you know for example your girlfriend wasn't banged by half of the Scunthorpe United squad while you were away and she didn't tell you.
     
  20. VeNT

    Capodecina

    Joined: 9 Jan 2003

    Posts: 20,674

    Location: Cornwall

    /me waits for "I cheated on her and you all told me to tell her, now shes killed me" thread