Soldato
Sorry to hear about that bloody morons chuck them in the army i say they wont know whats hits them. 
I bloody hate chavs! (keyboard warrior rant)
- Thread starter RandomTom
- Start date
Soldato
Raikiri said:Yes, arm them that seems like the smart thing to do
I dont mean arm them (well eventually they would be) the other factors in the army we all seen lads army i cant say if it happens for real but im sure it does
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Soldato
Next party you organise, I'll do the security.
If someone shifty asks you the time/ lighter cigarette keep walking and just say no. I thought that was well known.
TBH I must be lucky all the people I hear about on here getting randomly beaten up seems high and I don't exactly live in the nicest area around.
TBH I must be lucky all the people I hear about on here getting randomly beaten up seems high and I don't exactly live in the nicest area around.
Soldato
I know how you feel, a few chavs ran across a road when I was with a friend in yr10 and asked us for a lighter, we said no and continued walking, we went round a corner and they ran up to us, one started kicking my friend, the other punched me in the face. Do they get off on this or something!?
Nix said:
At Fawdon Metro station in Newcastle (those who know the area will know what's coming up...):
Charver (about 5'4", maybe 15 or 16 years old):
How, mate? Yer gorra light?
Me:
Sorry, dude. Don't smoke.
Charver:
Yeah, y'do! y'****in' lyin' to us, liiiiiiiike?!
Me:
I told you; I don't smoke. Never have.
Charver:
Ah've ****in' (somehow always pronounced in a way that rhymes with 'socking' :/ ) seen ye's!
Me:
Look, mate - **** off, okay?
At which point he takes a swing at me. Bearing in mind that I'm 6'3", he just manages to catch my bottom lip. Not particularly hard but the next morning I had a lower lip that would put Pete Burns to shame.
Anyway, my instant reaction was to hit him back (the best defence is offence, yadayadayada...Anyway, I'm big and can't run much since I buggered my kneecap playing rugby so retreat isn't an option...besides, I needed to catch the Metro...but that's another story...) And this time the height difference means I catch him on the bridge of the nose.
Then the oddest thing happened...I have NEVER seen this before or since.
He just concertinad (my mind says that's a word but my eyes are going "look, dude...it just looks wrong, okay?"...Much like with the word 'curious'; the more I look at it, the more 'wrong' it gets) into the ground. His legs gave way from under him and he fell vertically.
So I resume the wait for the Metro. After a minute or so, he gets up and the first thing he shouts is "How, YEES! ****in' (socking, again) knife the <euphemism for the female genetalia>!" at a group of half a dozen of his friends standing about ten feet away.
Their response:
"Nah, do it yourself."
It's amazing how charvers react when you remove their group support. They are pack animals. Remove them from that and they become terrified and humble.
*n
Associate
Bloody good idea - that'll at least stop the brain-dead scum from spreading any more of their kindNix said:
...No doubt the gangsta wannabes responsible for this incident already have the full weight of the local council's Social Services department feverishly working away to ensure they're not punished too harshly - might hurt their self-esteem, the poor little darlings ...
In all seriousness, I've been saying this for years and it will happen eventually - the lawlessness and yobbishness in this country is getting out of hand and there will come a point where law-abiding citizens will just say "Enough's enough ...".
Raikiri said:This happens a lot here too, never happened to me which I find quite strange considering I listen to rock/don't look at all chavvy and often carry about £500 worth of gadgets with me
Hope your mates are ok. Buy them all tazers for when they get better
Charver: "How, mate? Gonna give us y'phone?" (pointing at the brand-new p910i I'm clutching)
Me: "Nah...Don't think I will." *puts phone in pocket, zips pocket*
Charver: "Y'will, liiiiiiike!" *produces what could actually be the smallest penknife in existance*
Me: *lean right in to his face and scream* "******* DO IT THEN!"
Sorry but they really bring out the worst in me. I've had more than my fair share of run-ins with them (stabbed repeatedly and left for dead whilst walking home from school was probably the worst; they took about £1.20) and it's true that you can't reason with them. If they start on you, they are intent on causing GBH and you can't talk your way out of it. The only means to resolve is by speaking a language that they understand. I can't grunt so I turn from a passive, relaxed guy into a rather intimidating (keyboard warrioresque
) aggressive type.It's not big, it's not clever but it's saved my ass on several occasions.
*n
I was at this party too and the organiser had the usual "security" people on the door who are quite butch to say the least.
It was quite ironic really. Me and a friend went for a walk just to get out of the place and look for "Luke" as we had heard he'd been beaten up and no-one knew where he was. As we were just walking down this quiet street, my friend said to me "wouldn't it be funny if we went back and the police had raided the place" - and yes funnily enough there were 3 police cars parked outside. A chav was being bundled into one of them (kicking and screaming ofcourse). Another chav was arrested a few minutes later and proclaimed "ey 'oo grassed me in like?".
We left soon after all this happened, but to see "Luke's" face like that - it was awful. Badly bruised with a large bump on his forehead & cheek (to say the least). All i can say is i hope he's alright. He did manage to talk to the police wile he was there though, which is a good thing as atleast the chavs won't get away with it.
To be honest i half expected it to happen, but it was still a shock.
******* chavs!
It was quite ironic really. Me and a friend went for a walk just to get out of the place and look for "Luke" as we had heard he'd been beaten up and no-one knew where he was. As we were just walking down this quiet street, my friend said to me "wouldn't it be funny if we went back and the police had raided the place" - and yes funnily enough there were 3 police cars parked outside. A chav was being bundled into one of them (kicking and screaming ofcourse). Another chav was arrested a few minutes later and proclaimed "ey 'oo grassed me in like?".
We left soon after all this happened, but to see "Luke's" face like that - it was awful. Badly bruised with a large bump on his forehead & cheek (to say the least). All i can say is i hope he's alright. He did manage to talk to the police wile he was there though, which is a good thing as atleast the chavs won't get away with it.
To be honest i half expected it to happen, but it was still a shock.
******* chavs!
Soldato
Luke, if you get the opportunity, press charges. Don't let these little turds get away with it.
Can I say turds?
Can I say turds?
Soldato
Funniest anti-chav post ever.penski said:
Maybe, because they congregate in groups of up to thirty, they can only gain enough combined intelligence to channel their natural aggression into picking fights with postmen.
God forbid they amass in larger groups...It would be like Terminator. With acne. And hairspray.
ChavNet.
*n
God forbid they amass in larger groups...It would be like Terminator. With acne. And hairspray.
ChavNet.
*n
Soldato
That actually makes some sense, they don't seem to start fights on their own.
I've never understood why 'normal' teenagers don't protest more to the local authorities about chavs.
Why don't you campaign to give teachers/police the right to dish out effective punishment - the kind that will humiliate, hurt and act as a deterrent.
If you tell the authorities that this is what you want, en masse, they will have to take you seriously.
It's no good us adults doing it for you as we get the liberal loonies telling us it's wrong to punish kids. If you tell them you accept you need effective punishments put in place and are mature enough to accept punishment when given how can they argue?
I'm one of the few who believe there are more decent teenagers out there than chav ****s, time for you to stand up and prove me right......... if you've got the balls.
Why don't you campaign to give teachers/police the right to dish out effective punishment - the kind that will humiliate, hurt and act as a deterrent.
If you tell the authorities that this is what you want, en masse, they will have to take you seriously.
It's no good us adults doing it for you as we get the liberal loonies telling us it's wrong to punish kids. If you tell them you accept you need effective punishments put in place and are mature enough to accept punishment when given how can they argue?
I'm one of the few who believe there are more decent teenagers out there than chav ****s, time for you to stand up and prove me right......... if you've got the balls.
Soldato
I had a problem with a chav lad at the college I worked at, after getting him on his own as he was using a urinal, his ChavNet broke down.
Think it might have been the pee drenched leg (pee and leg both his) and the start of the tears that may have led to the dissolution of their "cru".
Think it might have been the pee drenched leg (pee and leg both his) and the start of the tears that may have led to the dissolution of their "cru".
Associate
next time you see 30 chavs in a party call the police straight away saying that there are chavs attacking everyone in the party and they have knives etc.. when the police cars are around the corner then YOU start the fight and let the chavs get arrested with all the drugs and knives on them 
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