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Quite a puzzler...

Discussion in 'General Discussion' started by penski, 22 May 2006.

  1. penski

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    ...As put to me by a friend last night:

    "Can you love someone but not stand to be around them?"

    I really don't know :/

    *n
     
  2. G|mp

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    In a family way or relationship way?
     
  3. Nix

    Capodecina

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    I'm sure it's possible. There's a thin line between love and hate.

    I'm sure things such as platonic love, it's possible.

    With physical attraction and love, this probably isn't the case. But relationships over time often degrade into platonic love.
     
  4. Mellownatts

    Hitman

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    If there annoying enough that you can't be in a room with them for longer than 5 minutes i would say so.

    Depends on the circumstances i guess.
     
  5. Sic

    Capodecina

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    don't think so. you're not obliged to love your family, just like you're not obliged to love your girl/boyfriend. there's members of my family that i hate (read: have NO positive feelings for) and i can't bear to be around.

    i think some people convince themselves that they love someone, when it's just their conscience telling them that they should, at least, care about them enough to pretend that they're in love.
     
  6. Kell_ee001

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    I think so.

    When you do love them but are very angry/upset then I think you can know in your heart that you love them but at that moment can't stand to be around them.

    Obviously this would only apply in fleeting moments but I think it might be possible :)
     
  7. penski

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    I think that's what she was getting at; I know her and her manhalf have been arguing a lot of late.

    Actually, I'll rephrase it based on what I know:

    "If the person you love cannot respond to you in a civil manner, can you be with them?"

    *n
     
  8. Mr Man

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    Yes....I have this feeling alot at the moment, due to one thing or another, but thats for another thread maybe :)
     
  9. Nix

    Capodecina

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    No.

    It doesn't matter if I love them or not, if someone was being unreasonable I wouldn't want to be around them. The affection you feel for said person would be pushed to the back of your mind.
     
  10. penski

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    Understandably.

    Would you want to still be *with* them but not live with them? A step backwards as it were.

    *n
     
  11. Sic

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    it's not a case of having the ability to be with them. i wouldnt want to be with them. it sounds like one party in this relationship isn't making an effort, and is trying to make the other's life a misery, or just **** them off so much that they finish it. horrible situation that i've been in, myself from both angles. and both times ended the same way:

    *bye bye*
     
  12. Mellownatts

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    A step backwards ends up in full time seperation most of the time.
     
  13. Kell_ee001

    Capodecina

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    That would depend on the situation. I could forgive and forget if there were other things contributing to the problem that could be worked on, possibly without the need to step back.

    If they were being nasty and disrespectful for no good reason without outside influence then most likely only a full split would do.
     
  14. penski

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    That's the thing - they're great together, they dote on each other...it's just that more and more frequently they bicker and it'll escalate into a full-blown argument...

    *n
     
  15. thelegend

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    yeah you can love some one

    but it may be to painful to see them.


    take splitting up with your partener for example. you would still love them but find it hard to be around them.
     
  16. Visage

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    Yes. Wolverhampton Wanderers Football Club........
     
  17. Sic

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    what are the arguments based on? do they start on little things and it just gets silly and out of hand? one of my relationship philosophies is that there's no reason to argue. if you want to be in an adult relationship, then behaving like an adult is a must. i don't argue in relationships, as i believe that there's always got to be a compromise. i don't think there's any argument you can have that doesn't have a reasonable solution, so i always endeavour to resolve it reasonably. some people find this a little weird, but it's so much better than petty bickering.
     
  18. G|mp

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    HeHeHe :D
     
  19. Nix

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    If the irritation or whatever the factor we're talking about here is continuous, I personally can't see the relationship working. The only reason I'd try my hardest to make things work in such an instance would be if children were a factor.
     
  20. Kell_ee001

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    I totally agree. Every situation has a compromise and adults would take the time to calmly and reasonable find them :)